Sunday Scaries
What is time?
Last night…
It’s 7pm on Sunday and I’m just now hopping on here. Today was supposed to be my writing day. My all day writing day. Instead it turned into finishing my budget and cleaning day.
I had to do my budget because like many other citizens of the modern world, I’m overextended and have no idea where my money goes. My mortgage is due in five days and this is when I start to get a little agitated.
Yesterday was supposed to be my budget day. But I had to work for about 4 to 5 hours to catchup on some freelance I was behind on. I also took a nap because I was tired and went for what turned out to be a very leisurely walk scoping out neighborhood gardens. Inspiration for when I can finally afford to redo my hideous patio (the one with the naked cherub statues the previous owner left behind) in 2-3 years time. So I didn’t start my budget until 8pm Saturday night while binging Love is Blind UK.
Turns out I made decent money last month for the first time in many moons. Since I was laid off from full-time work last year, I haven’t made a budget. It was way too depressing, considering I had no money.
In the last month I was at least able to order some new clothes from Shein (yup, I’m that asshole). It had to be done because 75% of my jeans don’t fit anymore. It’s not like I’m overweight, I’m just over 40. My 20s and 30s’ tight little bod has been replaced by bigger hips and belly fat that seemingly won’t go away. Now I’m really into wide leg pants with a stretchy waist because I want to be comfortable. I’m basically dressing like one of the Golden Girls.
I was supposed to get up early and finish my budget this morning, but of course I didn’t sit down to do that til 10am. Not the unrealistic 8am start time I envisioned (I never actually start on time). Today’s budget took about three hours because I write out everything I spend my money on and analyze it to see where I can cut back, and squeeze in another Shein order for additional wide leg stretchy pants and oversize t-shirts because I also enjoy dressing like a Gen Z teenager. Simply because of the comfort factor.
There is no reason I need to spend $60/month on Adobe Creative Suite when I only use Photoshop. FreshBooks can be put on hold until I have clients that don’t time track every second I work. SpyFu was another goner because I don’t have time to SEO optimize my site even if I wanted to (and I want to). I kept Netflix. I kept my Bret Easton Ellis and Red Scare Patreon subscriptions. You have to live a little.
Then I spent the next five hours today cleaning. It was supposed to be just two, but I don’t know what happened. I kept seeing things that needed to be scrubbed, wiped down, and washed. Then I had to iron the clothes that have been hang drying for the past four days, so that they don’t sit in a pile in my room for the next five days. I also had to rake all the pine droppings and leaves on my hideous patio, wash the rugs, and sweep. All before my roommates got home because I’m the only one who cleans and I’m renting out my house to them, so I guess that’s how it works?
Anyway, it’s almost 8pm. I’ve been wanting to write for the last two weeks, but where does the time go? I went to see Longlegs weeks ago and was planning on writing a review for you guys. Long story short, it was ok. Wasn’t scary, but was entertaining. Also funny, but confusing to me whether it was supposed to be. Everyone in the theater was laughing at the horror bits, including myself.
I tried to watch La Chimera on Hulu because I’ve been obsessed with Josh O’Connor since Challengers, but my God. It just was so goddamn slow. Also it took place in Italy in the winter? All the Italians were really pale. As a somewhat pale person of part Italian descent myself, I decided movies set in Italy should always be during the spring and summer when everyone is tan.
I’ve been re-watching Game of Thrones (a delight) and getting through Industry (a head scratcher), and of course watching shitty UK dating shows when I need to turn my brain off.
The good news is I’ve been getting more work. This is what I wanted. No, this is what I needed. But I’m sitting here and wondering where my weekend went. It’s over and I’m going to bed in an hour.